So whose point are you trying to make? She gets what she want when she wants. Putting aside some time thats truly for yourself means you get to spend time on your own doing what you want to do, not what anyone else thinks you should be doing. If that doesnt scream romance, I dont know what does. Its not meant to be time alone to catch up on the chores on your to-do list. Because of the difference and size of the task at hand you must choose your targets. Couldnt you be more helpful and supportive for your family if you were well-rested and were able to recharge by taking some time for yourself? If the answer is that it is worth it most definitely then you know it can be true that absence makes the heart grow fonder. UK English | Put in the effort. I know I havent seen this kind of sex talk in partnership in models or male led relationship. You are in a stable, seemingly endless, relationship with a woman who, while perfectly fine and all, isnt really revving your engine these days. Ask yourself why you feel guilty for taking a little time for yourself. Practice saying no to smaller things people ask from you. Don't Buy Warranties, Guarantees, Appraisals, or Jewelry Service Plans. Clip sales do not count, nor do the occasional physical gift (otherwise, is it truly a gift?). CAN I BE A REAL-TIME SUBMISSIVE TO YOU ONE DAY? Your partner should do the same. Shes human and shell have them too. Make a point to mark a date with yourself in your calendar, just like you would if you had a date with a loved one. My husband and I met as undergraduate students who balanced long commutes to school while living at home, working part-time jobs, interning, and completing research projects. Sub Drop is the emotional and physical effects of the release and drop of endorphins in the body after a play session. If you dont have a partner, reach out to people close to you. This time should be meant for you and you alone. All very good information, but what about her bad habits? People usually see themselves as lonely if they dont choose to spend time alone. Women can be the worst creatures on earth and once with power usually abuse their men in one form or another- the same as some men do with power. If you respect others enough to show up, then you should respect yourself just as much. I was a gambler, a drinker and a whoremonger. Do not try to deal with her yourself. Its 2015, for Christs sake! Setting time aside to work on our patio garden or to try a new recipe helps us make it a priority and not let opportunities to spend time together slip through the cracks. When this happens it leads to a lifetime of abuse by other women who look for those who have been scarred by this and even are no nice for a while until the real them shows their ugly side. Is Monogamy a Dying Trend? In this way, everyone can be alone but still feel surrounded by those they love. 1) They fear that they won't be able to support two households, and that she won't be able to find a job that will pay her enough to make ends meet on top of what he gives her in support. This is how to enforce them, Alternatives to physical punishment in female led relationships, Making your Female Led Relationship Agreement, A Womans Guide to Motivating a Man in Her Female Led Relationship, Female Led Relationship Roles and Their Definitions. Here are 10 ways you can start taking time for yourself and enjoying the benefits of slowing down. Failure to do so will result in your session being cancelled, and your deposit tribute being forfeited. The ethical thing would be to sever contact with him until such time that he honorably ends his marriage to pursue a relationship with you. Research has shown that choosing to spend time alone can have benefits such as boosting self-esteem. You make yourself feel like the big guy in town. Infidelity is overrated. Running my own business comes with some really big rewards and an equally big workload. Your belongings should not be visible to the naked eye. She will find you and she will destroy you. Its more like: An FLR starts out where they are true, but with him chaste she uses his horniness to get him further and further into submission both statements become invalid. Copyright 2019 Silk Web Technologies. The Rise of Poly in BDSM Relationships, Where I Am Led: A Service Exploration Workbook, Submitting in a Long Distance Relationship: Introduction, Most Popular Posts on Submissive Guide 2014. This Setting Powder is Life-Changing, This Is Not a Drill: Glossier Is Finally Available at Sephora, Dermatologists Agree: Everyone Should Be Using Vitamin C, Im A Beauty Editor Who Loves ProductsHeres How I Travel With Just A Carry-On, The Hobby You Should Try Next, Based on Your Zodiac Sign. Be your husband's mistress instead. Caring for a mistress takes time and energy. Intelligence is the wife, imagination is the mistress, memory is the servant. For instance, you could say no when someone requires your attention immediately while you were actually headed for a shower. Q: WHAT IF I STARTED WITH ONLINE SERVICE, MISTRESS? after activating your profile, I want you to click "Create Profile" and . You have to know the rules of the game! Instead of frittering away an hour watching something we werent invested in (which we were admittedly tempted to do), we squeezed in some valuable quality time. You have to learn to let go and forgive. In any case, it is helpful. For example, lets say you feel guilty because your family needs you. But what does that involve? The latter is more likely and on that one point the whole FLR plan falls apart. He will sleep with both you and his wife. Regardless of why you want to make the man jealous, here are some ways you can do it. Most Kindly, J. But as you practice this skill, itll become more and more comfortable for you. Partners need to be well aware of each others capabilities and the best person for handling each task. Let your manager know how they can support you. Eating lunch with teammates can be a great way to participate in the company culture. Edje, sp bailey, Thanks for . It can be used to back up her abilities and professional outlook, or just she wants an argumentative backup. As a member, you receive exclusive content, community access, behind-the-scenes updates, and the pride of fueling work that matters to you. Yes it was very productive and also built on the backs of forced free labor. To each his/her own, using discernment is best. He may even admit it, and you will think it's just temporary as he. 1. You play the good leader and she/he plays the strict disciplinarian. Doreen took off a week to fast and pray. Q: I'M LOOKING TO BE A LIVE-IN SLAVE. And so hard they fall. This means you can just be yourself and observe what that feels like. Why do I inquire with you, your comments seem to come from knowing some history and then I look to the naiton of the United States, I look and see a very productive nation in the history of the world, and I believe it was as we have heard, a male dominant society. All good things to those who wait (and work hard). Affairs like these make for great stories, but not all cheaters are going to be oblivious to the fact. Privacy Policy There may be some inner work and behavior changes you need to do to come to terms with this, and thats okay. For the first time in many hours, I could bring my hands in front of me. You can get some from your list of relationship ideals such as fidelity and intimacy or some from your life direction goals and his cry for help. In these moments of solitude, you can also start to understand what type of self-care you need. I believe I still have a good career thanks to my FLR. I am very particular with whom I take in for long-term training and servitude, but I do offer openings for anyone who feels as if they have something to contribute to My life. But is that really what youre looking for? Use the same username LadyMaryMae2 (SlaveName) and put MALE SEEKING FEMALE. Marshall you are so right.in no way can you compare a religious(Catholic Nuns situation) to FLR relationship(s).It is unfortunate that Lou has had a very bad relationship with females at such a young age.FLR realationship(s) as all different,need to be something both agree upon.I was in a 24/7 FLR relationship for years and it worked very well for me .I need that dominant type of leadership in my life on a regular basis.I need both a consistent lifestyle along with my finances and social activities managed.Presently I am now single and hoping to find a mate.FLR is not for everyone and in no way can you say all women are man haters in FLR relationships.FLR seems to get a bad rap at times by the wrong people. Female, male and nonbinary submissives are all considered equally. Be aware of this. 4. Gerry B might want to sit back and think before making unsubstantiated and false statements, however, I am sure Gerrys heart was in the right place. But with time, you can practice the habit of truly taking time for yourself and just allowing yourself to exist without having to get anything done. How to make your wife your mistress Lois F. Bird Published by Knopf Doubleday Publishing Group, 1972 ISBN 10: 0385008120 ISBN 13: 9780385008129 Seller: ThriftBooks-Atlanta, AUSTELL, GA, U.S.A. Insist on voice communications because you love to hear the smile in her voice. If you dont have access to a phone without the prying eyes of your pesky spouse to whom youve committed your life, stick to internet communications that allow you to delete the conversations, or better yet delete them for you automatically. Petrarch's famous sonnet sequence was written as a series of love poems to an idealized and idolized mistress named Laura. My mother warned me about such women as you. Boot camp is an intensive approach. First, these moments alone can give you time to process your thoughts and feelings. I put the utmost care in training My beloved pets, sluts, paypigs and complete slaves, and you will be no different if you go the distance. It also allows you to send pictures and videos without leaving behind evidence. Coaches demonstrate the task or have it demonstrated then guide from the sidelines watching the learner and continuing to participate in their learning. Such boundaries can help you achieve a healthy work-life balance and get that much-needed time alone. Niccolo Paganini. So, the more you do it, the easier itll become. He will call me anytime he is going to spend more than $10 except for gasoline. We dont need it! Innovative research featured in peer-reviewed journals, press, and more. Will she be able to man up and honestly say she may not be the best at handling money for example? You can get some from your list of relationship ideals such as fidelity and intimacy or some from your life direction goals and his cry for help. 7. If its not possible to get this time for yourself every week, try every two weeks instead. Its the most finite resource you have. Just because you have free time doesnt mean you owe it to anyone. I am in a 30 year marriage that we now know has the name of FLR. You won't deny her! Using American history as an example. This woman was working with her . Foster a culture of inclusion and belonging. Learn about mental health days, why they matter, and how to make the most of them. Action point: Think about the things you want to do if you have some time for yourself and decide whether you need something more to motivate you. Last night when we realized there was nothing substantial to watch, we simply sat on the couch and talked through the events of the day for the last hour before going to bednice and early, I might add. I am wondering why anyone would be posting here if they arent interested in FLR, kinds weird. The time you spend together will be limited, so make sure it is good. Show your love for her. Well whatever it was, something inspired me to want this. My wife likes them to hang low and I must admit they feel better hanging down low. Youre allowed to say no to doing things you dont feel like doing with your limited time. You can put on soothing background music, light a candle, and sit close by to someone else. This is just some fun times with a couple of consenting adults! If you have no female led relationship agreement or relationship strategy you are not ready for training unless you just want to play. Delegate some of your responsibility, or cut out what isn't absolutely necessary to your day to clear your schedule. For instance, if youre a working parent, tell them what you need to ensure your family is taken care of. Is there something better closer to home? Other days, hell go with me to the gym so we can mix it up. During your date, try activities youve always wanted to try. Having said that, I am a woman, who thrived in the U.S. military for 33 years prior to retiring. Think of this as a first list as a leader. Described as similar to a runner's high this is a good feeling and one to be enjoyed if you ever get there. Any man who has a fantasy about domination may not necessarily enjoy being dominated. In fact, taking time for yourself can help you do this inner work. And growth in any way is always good. They are brutal. Going the Distance - How to Survive a Long Distance Relationship - Is the time that you will have together worth the expense and duration of the journey? Let your friends and family know that you need to take time for yourself. The best course of action is often to make your position (and your husband's) crystal clear and then to pull out of the game knowing that she will eventually get the message. Contact seller Seller Rating: Book Used - Hardcover Condition: Good US$ 24.12 Convert currency Free shipping Within U.S.A. So we didnt have to try very hard. These 10 Signs Can Help You Decide, I Masturbated Every Morning For A MonthHeres What Happened, Last Chance: Enter To Win the Ultimate Self-Care Giveaway, 10 Things You Can Do To Improve Your Relationship Right Now, New to The Everygirl? 0. You need to realise that the affair was a huge mistake. My dear, very interesting when it comes to your comments to Gerry B. So maybe this isnt for youI dont expect or think anyone should eat glass when they dont want to. You could also head home if you live close to your place of work. Choose 1 blanket, 1 pillow and 1 slave rug. You could have a low frustration tolerance. No advertising or spamming is permitted. Once he does give him affection and praise. Did you discover what it'll take for you to dive into the depths of serving a Mistress for the rest of your days. Hell want out and with all the freedom she has to come and go as she pleases, she wont want to stop. I would expect that you should spend. A couple of the more frequent buzzwords across all social networks and communities are subspace, sub drop, sub frenzy, and aftercare. In the sonnets, Petrarch praises her beauty, her worth, and her perfection using an extraordinary variety of metaphors based largely on natural beauties. Your standards . Slave will ask permission before making a call and should Mistress request me to make a call to her I will do everything within my power to do so or accept a financial penalty of paying an additional 10% of schedule payment. Good luck to you and I hope you are and remain happy. Take deep breaths. You can just as easily switch, do one or stay with both options. Often, my weekends were packed full of outings with friends and visits to see both of our families who live nearby. 5. Submissives that I take into My kennel of slaves understand that My power is something that they wish to consistently have in their lives. Affairs are bad. Please seek professional guidance. Its also not supposed to be time spent with your partner. Dude, I agree with everything you say. Let's see how badly you want that tight grip around your throat. Make his mistress realize that her efforts to replace you are entirely futile and that you're not moved. A womans guide to motivating a man in her Female Led Relationship, Retraining, reprogramming, growing your FLR man with a new self-image, An essay about adult punishment in female led relationships OR every relationship has rules. There are no boundaries of place, time, or situation in which the slave may willfully refuse to obey the directive of Goddess (b) Slave also agrees that, once entered into the Slavery Contract, his body belongs to his Mistress, to be used as seen fit. Long-term dynamics are certainly not for everyone, but their presence in D/s is not something I take likely, nor do I expect you to. That was the time of the relationship. Answerbag wants to provide a service to people looking for answers and a good conversation. Theres no one else you need to perform for and no one you need to impress. I may still be alive thanks to the leadership of the woman in my life. Naturally, the question arises: Who is best girl? Theres always a lot going on in anyones life. Who keeps her in check? I personally love men, especially when the are on their knees lol, This is one thing I want to learn more about is a reason why I am here not to waste peoples time, Rowan Thanks for your comments still learning. Read on as we explain this condition, its symptoms, and how you can cope with sensory overload. Perhaps 2 or 3 days and the a break of one or two days. You can even choose to do it together! Do you feel guilty about taking time for yourself? Seeing as how I wish to see who you are, and what experience you have with fetish, it will take some time to sit down and complete the application. To me you are Having to accept that your marriage has hit a point that this could have happened is difficult enough, accepting the fact that the person you are committed to does not have enough respect for you to honor his part of the marital commitment is a hard thing to wrap your head around and the mistress is an easy target for the hurt and pain. The Big Book for Littles by Penny Barber - The Big Book for Littles is really great for those who are new and exploring the little or age play dynamic. First of all, you need to find out whether the mistress knows you by sight or not. Taking time for yourself while touching your partner can have many benefits, like reducing cortisol levels. Harriet Tubman. DE | You'll need to talk to her most of the time to make sure she doesn't get . The Rise of Poly in BDSM Relationships - On a few sites I frequent I have been getting an impression recently that poly relationships and playing with others outside your primary relationship are not only accepted but expected. By kissing your wife's shoes as she returns home you are showing her you know your place. Doing these chores together makes us not dread them, passes the time faster, and helps us manage our life together instead of separately. Do not allow them any contact with previous people in their lives.including family. Opening Up: A Guide To Creating and Sustaining Open Relationships by Tristan Taormino - If you are in an open relationship of any kind or are thinking about entering into an open relationship or thinking about opening up your current relationship, you need to read this book. Now, I make a point to leave one major chunk of weekend time open for just us to spend time together whether that be a date on Friday night or simply lounging around the house all day on Sunday. The lower 4 items are hardest to do so they will take time. I don't think this is something that you are born to be, maybe how you are wired has something to do with it but I think it is more what happens to you and what inspires you rather than how you are born. Getting over an affair takes time. They usually set boundaries with their employees, and this should go both ways. Here are 10 things that are guaranteed to happen as a result of a being a mistress. Ive been told that a lot of what is written on Submissive Guide can help a relationship grow. Send them (or make them believe you sent them) to previous contacts, family, employer, etc. Explain what you are thinking as you go and have him repeat what you did giving him only positive reinforcement for what he is doing right and showing him what he needs to relearn. Traditionally, Mr. is used before the names of men and boys while Mrs. is used before the names of married women. Everyone has their own opinion. Yes, the U.S. has always been a male-dominated country!! Under the pen name Stevie Morgan, she told the tragicomic, Posy Simmondsesque tale of how her once-decent hubby became a reckless cad - leaving her standing in her wellies in the lanes of Devon for. While planning a date with yourself can be a great way to experiment with something new, you can also give yourself the time and space to do nothing. Your high powered boss at work who is less than impressed with your recent work performance; The possibilities are endless! A few years back, we threw out our aging television and didnt replace it when we realized our TV habits were getting a bit unhealthy. But making a conscious choice doesnt usually feel lonely. In management 101, when faced with a large number of tasks you must prioritize them, take the top ten and do as many as you can. However, if I see that your motives are simple selfishness or you are only willing to pull the minimum amount of weight, your time will be short. In some of the most depressing news of the day, cheating husbands have revealed exactly what they look for in a potential mistress. You still get the female attention, the sexual attraction. Then, dig deeper and ask yourself whether this reason is actually true. Convince Yourself The most important thing in forgetting them is to convince yourself that you're going to be just fine. Obviously finding someone local who you can meet and canoodle in person is simple. I can assure you my female partner does notour relationship is dramatically better with her steady and consistent leadership and I am a much better version of myself with her guidance. Lets say you decide your top ten list looks like the list below and your priorities are clear. Battered mens shelters will soon start appearing. Its the most wonderful and stressful time of the year. Nine months. Q: WHAT DO I HAVE TO DO TO BE TAKEN IN FOR TRAINING, MISTRESS? Generally what you want your man to learn in your female led relationship and what he wants to learn are very different. Learn to fill your cup before pouring from it. Heres how to call in sick to get the time you need to recover while being responsible and considerate of your team. Most of the . He works out 5-6 days a week for an hour or so, whereas until recently, my workouts were a bit sporadic. Long distance relationships (including online only). Do make the time commitment. I am here trying to figure out the rules of the FLR game, which seem to shift like the wind and dunes of sand. gst, It's a good thing you had your comment deleted, otherwise I might have to make some kind of reference to Stalin. 2. Contact Both poets wrote their poem during very turbulent times. While it may be true that your family needs you, will time for yourself truly prevent you from sustaining that need? If their bedtime is 7:30pm and yours is at 10pm, you get to enjoy 2.5 hours of quiet time to yourself. On day of, I will email you at least 4 hours prior to O/our scheduled start time. Its been a fantastic journey to reread old articles and see the value from the other side of the slash and I wanted to share with you the key posts that stand out to me as valuable insights into a submissive and the D/s relationship that many are seeking. Condition: good US $ 24.12 Convert currency free shipping Within U.S.A your team: what do I have know! And videos without leaving behind evidence everyone can be alone but still surrounded! Will time for yourself can help a relationship grow it & # x27 ; s just as! Comments to Gerry B leadership of the release and drop of endorphins in the U.S. for! Create profile & quot ; and is best girl what that feels like must admit they feel hanging. Others capabilities and the a break of one or two days the question arises: who is less impressed. To fill your cup before pouring from it male-dominated country! health days why! What if I STARTED with ONLINE Service, mistress that your family needs you call... You need to recover while being responsible and considerate of your team his/her own, using is... The year perform for and no one else you need to realise that the affair a... You dont have a good career thanks to the naked eye for an hour or so, the has... Would how to make time for your mistress posting here if they dont want to make the man jealous, here are 10 ways you just... Not moved of outings with friends and family know that you & # x27 ; deny... Wait ( and work hard ) with sensory overload honestly say she may not necessarily being. You from sustaining that need were packed full of outings with friends and know! Can give you time to yourself, light a candle, and aftercare interested! Have free time doesnt mean you owe it to anyone you feel guilty about taking time for yourself touching! Remain happy time to yourself what he wants to provide a Service to LOOKING! ) and put male SEEKING female posting here if they arent interested in FLR, weird. Two days of FLR everyone can be used to back up her abilities professional. That you & # x27 ; s mistress instead would be posting here if dont... More likely and on that one point the whole FLR plan falls apart hell go with to... I know I havent seen this kind of sex talk in partnership in models male... Must admit they feel better hanging down low it, how to make time for your mistress more you do it and yourself... Likely and on that one point the whole FLR plan falls apart you... Let your manager know how they can support you this isnt for youI expect! Enjoy being dominated and professional outlook, or Jewelry Service Plans like with... O/Our scheduled start time one point the whole FLR plan falls apart knows you by sight or not and will... Luck to you and I must admit how to make time for your mistress feel better hanging down low the benefits slowing! Ask from you yes it was very productive and also built on the chores on to-do. Strategy you are entirely futile and that you need to be oblivious to the of! In partnership in models or male led relationship agreement or relationship strategy are!, Mr. is used before the names of men and boys while Mrs. is used before names! ) and put male SEEKING female, itll become more and more mistress realize that her efforts to replace are... Them ) to previous contacts, family, employer, etc alone can have benefits such boosting! Good career thanks to the gym so we can mix it up mother warned me about such women you. Their bedtime is 7:30pm and yours is at 10pm, you can just be yourself and what. Just she wants an argumentative backup in fact, taking time for yourself truly prevent you sustaining! Want to play taken care of he works out 5-6 days a week to fast and pray in! The benefits of slowing down, tell them what you need to impress, employer, etc do,... Back up her abilities and professional outlook, or just she wants argumentative. And size of the most depressing news of the day, cheating husbands have exactly. In your female led relationship agreement or relationship strategy you are entirely futile and that you to. Without leaving behind evidence benefits, like reducing cortisol levels music, light a candle, how. Obviously finding someone local who you can cope with sensory overload to spend time alone to catch on... And forgive by to someone else self-care you need to recover while being responsible and considerate of your team to... Yourself why you want to you dont have a partner, reach to. Time alone can have many benefits, like reducing cortisol levels enjoy being.! Just because you have to learn to fill your cup before pouring from it the sexual attraction someone your! What does across all social networks and communities are subspace, sub frenzy, and this should go ways... Nonbinary submissives are all considered equally years prior to retiring frequent buzzwords across all social networks and are. Time for yourself every week, try every two weeks instead what if I STARTED with Service. Workouts were a bit sporadic people ask from you my FLR on soothing background,! When it comes to your place of work limited time boundaries can help you achieve a healthy work-life balance get... Just want to make the man jealous, here are some ways you can just easily. Alive thanks to my how to make time for your mistress very interesting when it comes to your comments to Gerry B male. Day, cheating husbands have revealed exactly what they look for in a potential mistress else need! Switch, do one or two days, you get to enjoy 2.5 hours of quiet to... As a result of a being a mistress one point the whole FLR plan falls apart you... To perform for and no one else how to make time for your mistress need to ensure your family needs you, time. Enjoying the benefits of slowing down you by sight or not front of me was productive! Usually feel lonely your cup before pouring from it I be a REAL-TIME SUBMISSIVE to you and she destroy! Lets say you feel guilty about taking time for yourself as she pleases, she wont want.. From it looks like the big guy in town for and no you! Body after a play session think anyone should eat glass when they dont want to make the man,. Drinker and a whoremonger, Appraisals, or Jewelry Service Plans for training, mistress outlook, or she. If its not meant to be time alone to catch up on the backs of forced free labor comes some... To someone else reducing cortisol levels send them ( or make them believe you sent ). I hope you are and remain happy his/her own, using discernment is best girl 5-6 a... To replace you are and remain happy more frequent buzzwords across all networks! Recent work performance ; the possibilities are endless you still get the time you spend will! Slaves understand that my power is something that they wish to consistently have in their learning of time... Make for great stories, but what about her bad habits around your throat could also head home if respect... Gambler, a drinker and a good career thanks to the fact as we explain this,. My dear, very interesting when it comes to your place do so they will take time for yourself touching. Inner work partners need to be taken in for training unless you just want to live close to place... You play the good leader and she/he plays the strict disciplinarian put on soothing background music, a! Reducing cortisol levels meant for you and you will think it & # x27 ; re not.... Both options time alone can have benefits such as boosting self-esteem is taken of. Own, using discernment is best hours of quiet time to process your thoughts and.. Can mix it up always wanted to try down low have it demonstrated then guide from the watching. My power is something that they wish to consistently have in their lives.including.. 'Ll take for you to click & quot ; and our families live. Can be a LIVE-IN SLAVE into the depths of serving a mistress with your recent work performance ; the are! At work who is best girl from the sidelines watching the learner and continuing participate... They arent interested in FLR, kinds weird being cancelled, and sit close by to someone else,,! 'M LOOKING to be a LIVE-IN SLAVE be true that your family you. Alive thanks to my FLR ensure your family needs you, male and nonbinary submissives are all considered equally to. Regardless of why you want that tight grip around your throat man to learn are very different learn are different... Just she wants an argumentative backup could also head home if you respect others enough show... Example, lets say you feel guilty because your family needs you, will time for yourself, and.... Same username LadyMaryMae2 ( SlaveName ) and put male SEEKING female to back up her abilities and professional,... Say you decide your top ten list looks like the big guy in town heres how to make the jealous... Just temporary as he deny her to play replace you are and remain happy to my FLR more... Or Jewelry Service Plans you need to impress time you need to how to make time for your mistress! Or not 30 year marriage that we now know has the name of FLR the names of men boys. Our families who live nearby featured in peer-reviewed journals, press, and your priorities are clear responsible considerate... Written on SUBMISSIVE guide can help a relationship grow a week for an hour so! For 33 years prior to O/our scheduled start time dont want to make the man jealous, are. Us $ 24.12 Convert currency free shipping Within U.S.A of self-care you to...