The sight of me walking with my head high -- brown, bearded, and in a bold red lip -- was too much for them. Are these my own hands? It became about being seen in a different way. And thats what were seeing, unfortunately, in 2021. Vaid-Menon said. Join us next time as we contemplate the process of finding a spiritual path with Tara Brach, psychologist, author, and esteemed teacher of meditation, emotional healing, and spiritual awakening. Vaid-Menon headlined the New York Comedy Festival last month, including two shows on Nov. 13. "People dont know how to receive that love," they said. If you are the talent and wish to request a profile update or removal from our online directory, please submit a profile request form. Is this me? The emphasis on our appearance distracts us from the real focus: power., Conforming to the gender binary was about wanting to hold on to power., Conformity requires us to minimize our differences for the greater good. But I dont know if thats honest about being alive. But before we begin, Alok first shares their thoughts of a sculpture titled The Buddha Triumphing Over Mara. She eventually passed on without ever seeing me as myself. Web89 quotes from Alok Vaid-Menon: 'we have been taught to fear the very things that have the potential to set us free', 'Its not just that you internalize the shame; rather, it becomes Because there are things more important to me than that. And that cant coexist with a project that is more about control than creative self-exploration. Vaid-Menon said. Yes, but what kind of beauty do I want to make? Dont miss this powerful poem from Alok Vaid-Menon, performing in Minneapolis, MN. All American Entertainment has successfully secured celebrity talent like Alok Vaid-Menon for clients worldwide for more than 20 years. Copyright 2023 Apple Inc. All rights reserved. Next Thing: This month, Mx. As a subscriber, you have 10 gift articles to give each month. ALOK is a dynamic and seasoned presenter who excels in tailoring their message to their audience from college students to corporate boardrooms. Alok Vaid-Menon generally travels from New York, NY, USA and can be booked for (private) corporate events, personal appearances, keynote speeches, or other performances. As I continue my journey of self-acceptance, I see so much more beauty around me. And then practice that. She is the partner of comedian Kate Clinton. Its irrelevant. Vaid-Menon explores ideas through poetry and nonfiction, but also through fashion, virtual book clubs and live performances. I just was. So it means that Im kind of ambivalent about form and Im more invested in flow. Mx. Do Gametes (Egg/Sperm) Create a Sex Binary? Toward the start of the conversation, Heath told Vaid-Menon that when he listens to them speak, he asks himself, "Why do I not fight for them?". Beauty, for me, is what the natural orientation of the universe is returning to, said Alok Vaid-Menon. It felt like the body was a mere suggestion. Our agents are happy and able to submit an offer to the speaker or celebrity of your choice, letting you benefit from our reputation and long-standing relationships in the industry. Body positivity is a social movement that embraces everything that makes us beautiful and unique. But for me, beauty is what we feel like. Im going to act like a fool because it makes me feel good. I am awake.. Vaid-Menons presentation, often blending traditionally feminine shapes, such as bras and skirts, with clothing that defies gender categories. That is the poetic work. So its not that were waiting for a better world, but were instantiating that world, with a way that we show up in space. Before we come to a close, Alok shares their practice of how breath can be used as a tool to move through moments of discomfort. Anyone can read what you share. Gender diversity is an integral part of our existence. "I don't need your help," they said, adding that they "have an unshakable and irrevocable sense of who I am" and don't need to prove anything. I think that I always want to remember and teach the world that I was born with a heart, two lungs, two eyes, no shame. Normativity looks like a specific sneaker brand being upheld as the best. Gender-neutral language isnt about replacing an old norm with a new one. The fear is not of what could be, or what was, its the fear of what is. This world in a post-9/11 era told me that I was brown and that brown meant certain things. they tell us that someone jumped in front of the tracksthat he died upon impactso we just sit there in silence as they remove his remains. At what point does femininity become synonymous with apology? Because before I could speak, I could gesture. And I wrote one of my first collections ever of poetry that I didnt write to be published. . A listing or profile on this website does not imply an agency affiliation or endorsement by the talent. WebDo you know who you are outside of who you have been told you should be? ", "I dont need your help. But there are so many more important questions to be asked when a child is born, such as: Hows your baby doing? or How can I support you during this time? or Why is it so expensive to raise kids? Or maybe even Where can I donate to help?, Gender non-conforming people are not opportunisitic; we are oppressed., Common sense is what happens when a particular point of view is regarded as the status quo because its held by the people in power, not necessarily because it is right., The scrutiny on our bodies distracts us from what's really going on here: control. Normativity, then, is about value judgment and shouldnt be used interchangeably with normal., Gender is not what people look like to other people; it is what we know ourselves to be. and some part of usis happy because this, this is the first time we havefelt like part of something greater than ourselves in a whilein this city where sometimes it takesan accident to remember what the purpose of abody is to begin with. But, in my experience, a commitment to honest self-actualization yields unparalleled peace and conviction. Alok Vaid-Menon and the Art of Standing Out. Awaken is sponsored by Tricycle: The Buddhist Review, a print and digital magazine dedicated to making Buddhist teachings broadly available. "So I guess I would rephrase your question to be, 'Can you help me get free?' Big Break: This summer, Mx. And people are saying thats a threat.". Vaid-Menon appeared on Man Enough, a podcast that explores what masculinity is; previous guests have included Shawn Mendes and Matthew McConaughey. And who had, and continue to hold, particular social, cultural, spiritual roles in community. AWAKEN is produced by the Rubin Museum of Art in collaboration with Sound Made Public. Diversity and inclusivity are not just industry buzzwords. To use his own words, he once declared, I am not a man. 2017 also saw ALOK being selected as the youngest recipient of the Live Works Performance Act Award, granted to ten performance artists across the world. And I wanted so badly back then to be a dancer. The activist wrote a book describing the rights of the gay community, which was released in 1995. We are not trying to establish a new beauty standard. These inspiring keynote Coming from many different backgrounds, these men and women are popular entertainers, athletes, models, and more. Webwe have been taught to fear the very things that have the potential to set us free Alok Vaid-Menon 63 likes Like Its not just that you internalize the shame; rather, it becomes You know, I think that theres a lot of misapprehension, miscomprehension about people like me. We use these artworks as a jumping off point to better understand the paths our guests have been on and where they are going. Nonbinary activist Alok Vaid-Menon broke down the history of and problems with the gender binary and how people can fight against it in video that has gone viral on social media. They've repressed their own creativity.". All American Entertainment (AAE) exclusively represents the interests of talent buyers, and does not claim to be the agency or management for any speaker or artist on this site. This podcast is supported by Barbara Bowman, the Ellen Bayard Weedon Foundation, the Prospect Hill Foundation, Bob and Lois Baylis and public funds from the New York City Department of Cultural Affairs in partnership with the City Council. And because I was a quote-unquote boy I was not supposed to be that feminine. What this looked like with the British in India is the criminalizing of gender non-conformity and requiring gender variant people to register themselves with the police and stop quote-unquote cross-dressing, and the administration of cross-dressing laws, the banning of public performance, and the cessation of cultural life and art form. Alok uses the pronoun they and has received international attention for And so freedom for me is a daily practice, and its constantly evolving and absolutely not linear, which is so unfortunate sometimes. ", Billy Porter, who stars in "Pose," wrote that he "felt this on SO many levels. Let, This #trans couple will be the first known parents, With anti-LGBTQ+ and anti-trans legislation on the, Because its the New Year, lets talk about ch, How to set a boundary? our train is delayed and i am late for lunch with a boy i like because he makes me feel less lonely and that seems like a sufficient definition for love Two people can look similar and be completely different genders. I wanted to say, look, I have found this beauty in myself and in the universe, let me share it with you. And I know that the magic continues, because I was able to return home to it. i will soon forget. I think for me it also takes the form of style. You no longer need the people at school telling you not to dress like that; you already do it to yourself., I am sorry that the only way we have been taught to heal is to hurt., The thing about shame is that it eats at you until it fully consumes you. And so when I outfit myself in my best form of myself, its because Im trying to receive divinity. Know that you're divine. One of my favorite things was going to weddings and seeing intergenerational dancing. Its that the palette that weve been taught and disciplined into makes us fear what already is. And I think that I still practice that commitment for better or for worse. I used to love dancing, and I think dance was my first language. In this episode, we examine our divine nature and consider who we truly can be in the absence of judgment. Diversity and inclusivity are not just industry buzzwords. School, Vaid-Menon explained to me, was difficult, and they needed an outlet. For an optimal experience visit our site on another browser. WebThat everyone is at once capable of receiving and enacting violence, including little girls. by their tongues. The presumption is always, "Why wouldn't anyone want to be beautiful?". Search instead in Creative? Valheim Genshin Impact Minecraft Pokimane Halo Infinite Call As a full-service talent booking agency, we have access to virtually any speaker or celebrity in the world. Theres such a natural template for another way to relate to the earth. Why would you do this, if you lost access to power, legitimacy, intelligibility? And so, what I guess Im trying to cultivate in my life is the kind of courage and conviction and stamina to continue every day to ask myself, Who am I? And what a delight and what a joy it is to be foolish together. I was feeling and being. And if youre enjoying this podcast, leave us a review wherever you listen to podcasts. Stuart C. Wilson / Getty Images for The Business of Fashion, postcards that showed women dressed up as men. Leaving us a review is one of the best ways to help this podcast reach more listeners like you. say: these past thirty minutes were the first time i have been forced to publicly grieve death in a long timeand there is somethingbeautiful about that say: what if we stopped moving more often, took a second to absorb the pain,let it fill us a little less empty. The gender binary - the maintenance of two separate and opposite genders - is a system of power that exists to create conflict and division. In this 10-part series, we explore the dynamic path to enlightenment and what it means to wake up. Is this my own gender? And what I gained was my life back. In a world structured by dichotomy and dualism, we transcend and invite another way of not just living but thinking, not just thinking but living. Let me share that. I see interconnectivity with nature, the earth, humanity, and a deep practice of humility. Thats not to say that its not still painful and awful and bad, and its not to romanticize, but it is to say that nothing is fixed. And the argument is that historically color became associated with indigenous people, with communities of color, and with women. All rights reserved. "And I don't think the majority of people are ready to heal, and that's why they repress us as trans and gender-variant people because they've done this violence to themselves first," Vaid-Menon said. Explore Gaming. Alok Vaid-Menon have Our booking agents have successfully helped clients around the world secure talent like Alok Vaid-Menon for both live and virtual events for over 20 years. And what does it mean to move from there? Fill out a, Booking fees for Alok Vaid-Menon, or any other speakers and celebrities, are determined based on a number of factors and may change without notice. I participated in a really stringent, straight jacket of choreography, deepening my voice, restricting my gesture, straightening out my wrists. Awaken is produced by the Rubin Museum of Art in collaboration with Sound Made Public. WebALOK VAID-MENON: I sacrificed so much. And what I gained was my life back. All Rights Reserved. But Im less concerned with what I sacrificed as much as I am with what I gained. Although I am constantly harassed for it, I am able to keep going because I know who I am. "Thats the paradigm shift I really want to move away from is that the fear and the danger makes it so that people arent ready to receive love. What kind of person do I want to be? Alok Vaid-Menon: The Urgent Need for Compassion. The reason you don't fight for me is because you're not fighting for yourself fully. Like that feels like the real treat of the wedding. ALOKs commitment to creative expression, vulnerability, and gender justice has brought them to present at more than 500 venues in over 40 countries in the last decade. not, 'Can you help me help you?'" And so what I used to do is, I would just dance for my local Indian community. I admire Alok, because they work to normalize discussions of trauma, shame, and violence against trans and gender non-conforming (GNC) people of color, one poem, performance, and outfit at a time. They are a literal style and thought icon, and impressively, show immeasurable grace while frequently under attack. And if youre enjoying this podcast, leave us a review wherever you listen to podcasts. In a secular world like the West, art is one of the only spaces for this mode of relating, this kind of unfurling. All American Entertainment Named to Inc. Best Workplaces in 2022. And I caught fire, which is intense. It didn't work. And then I ask it until I can remember that the shame was not my own. Beauty is about looking like yourself, even in the face of social and cultural repression. We tell them that they are not real. Let us know whats wrong with this preview of. You burnt yourself last week and you cannot help but notice the patch of hair on your left leg the flames took with them. And this is especially the case in South Asia, where theres a vibrant legacy of gender variant people who go under many names, but are often conventionally understood as hijras, kottis, aravanis. This false choice of boy or girl, man or woman, male or female is not natural - it is political. When you experience us and our, our, and our way of being, you realize that there is an alternative way. In a viral clip from the podcast "Man Enough," the nonbinary poet and speaker said the gender binary hurts everyone not just trans people. They later added that people need to have compassion before "comprehension" meaning they need to have empathy for trans people even if they don't understand them. But Im less concerned with what I sacrificed as much as I am with what I gained. And I had to alchemize it and hack at it. In her eyes my journey was about hurting her, not about healing myself. We deserve more options. A kind of hopeful zeitgeist of life-making, of like, look at what Im able to create. ALOK has collaborated with human rights organizations all over the world and media outlets like CNN, the Guardian, and the BBC to amplify the visibility of trans and gender non-conforming people. I began to use color to return to my own color and to see the large swath of colors in the world and realize its not that color is the problem. I sacrificed so much. I would tell everyone, Im going to grow up and Im going to be a dancer. Trans and nonbinary people also shared parts of the interview on Twitter. I dont know if Ill ever be able to account for the grief of it, but I think that what I can do and what I hope to do is to believe that healing is possible. And I had to basically stay at home and I started to really write. This writer and performance artist is fighting for a world where all people are able to self-determine their gender. Josefina Santos for The New York Times By Julia Carmel Dec. 4, For more information about our guest and to see images of the artwork in this episode, visit RubinMuseum.org/awakenpod. . And maybe I would ambition so far to say perhaps dance was all of our first language. That hatred you feel when you see us having the audacity to live a life without compromise, that hatred is for yourSELF.". In a world thats committed to making your life miserable, theres something audacious and beautiful about insisting on maintaining your humor and your delight.. And its just idiosyncratic and strange and utterly uncinematic. Gender is not what people look like to other people; it is what we know ourselves to be. Their work as a leading figure in the movement for gender fluidity takes them from starring in HBOs "The Trans List" (2016) and "Random Acts of Flyness" (2018), to designing three gender-neutral fashion collec-tions, to modeling for New York Fashion Week and Vogue editorials, and to gracing the stages of venues such as Beautycon, the New York Times Global Assembly, and SXSW to speak about overcoming marginalization and self-acceptance. By encouraging and broadcasting the best and brightest performance poets of today, we hope to broaden poetry's audience, to expand its reach and develop a greater level of cultural appreciation for the art form.Help us caption \u0026 translate this video!https://amara.org/v/CYwp1/ And so actually I had a relationship with my body that I am still trying to remember, which was, I just moved to communicate. That, actually, even though Im unsafe from other people, when I am expressing myself, Im unsafe to myself when Im not expressing myself. The way hair grows back, scabs heal, lips kiss. poet. What I recollect is a feeling of unbridled joy, a feeling of wonder, of the enormity and potentiality of my body and this universe and art. Rather, we are trying to make standard that there is no one way to be beautiful -- there is just your way to be beautiful. And I can feel it there in the way that I move. I now know that there are as many ways to be beautiful as there are people. That sense of safety, of trust, of legibility and coherence. What kind of energy do I want to be a part of? I describe putting together an outfit as making an altar on my body. During normal business hours, we respond to most inquiries within 4 hours. There were years of my life that I didnt allow any audio or video recording of me whatsoever. For so long I lived my life within society's constraints of who I was supposed to be. So if its like, oh, Im feeling shame that theres hair on my face, I close my eyes and I breathe in to that. That while we might mechanically be alive, while we might be speaking, we never really do the due diligence to ask, Are these the words of my own that Im speaking? When in fact we are guilty of the crime of being alive and meaning it. One of life's paradoxes is that we are encouraged to "be ourselves," but are often punished when we do. as if this struggle is not your struggle. "They've repressed their own femininity. Eyes on the Prize: Fashion plays an important role in Mx. When Alok Vaid Menon performed this spoken word poem live at #Spoken2019, they left the crowd stunned. Vaid-Menon appeared on "Man Enough," a podcast that seeks to undefine traditional gender roles and masculinity, hosted by actor Justin Baldoni, writer and MSNBC columnist Liz Plank and composer Jamey Heath. And I realized that pain cant be eternal, because I can still make beauty from it. ", They said though trans and nonbinary people face violence and death for challenging traditional gender norms, they don't want people to fight for their rights "because you want to protect me or you want to help me.". I feel like every day is an artistic and spiritual endeavor to be what is. These are the sacrifices a body must make for growing too fast. So because I couldnt go out and dance, because I couldnt go distract myself, because I was in pain, I had to sit with the pain, and I had to make something out of it. WebFuneral by Alok Vaid-Menon. In her eyes my journey was about hurting her, not about healing myself. Accessing this beauty can feel impossible in a system that rewards conformity over creativity. As a mixed-media artist their work explores themes of trauma, belonging, and the human condition. Theres this term thats circulating called chromophobia, fear of color. And so now what Ive realized, and this is the spiritual realization, that when I am not living in practicing my radiant beauty, I am doing harm to myself. All American Speakers is a "buyers agent" and exclusively represents talent buyers, meeting planners and event professionals, who are looking to secure celebrities and speakers for personal appearances, speaking engagements, corporate entertainment, public relations campaigns, commercials, or endorsements. #degenderfashion love & need you contact@alokvmenon.com We know how to do it so well to other people because we were the first testing grounds. This podcast is inspired by the exhibition Awaken: A Tibetan Buddhist Journey Toward Enlightenment, which illustrates the stages of enlightenment through paintings, sculptures, and other objects. For better or for worse ways to help this podcast reach more listeners like.! You listen to podcasts voice, restricting my gesture, straightening out my wrists listeners. It there in the absence of judgment help me help you? ',. For me, is what we feel like every day is an integral part of existence... Ask it until I can still make beauty from it for the Business of,. At what point does femininity become synonymous with apology free? ' as many ways be... In 1995 be published the wedding I wrote one of my favorite things was to... They are a literal style and thought icon, and I think that I move of choreography, deepening voice! Why would n't anyone want to be a dancer live at # Spoken2019, they left the crowd stunned returning! You are outside of who I was able to self-determine their gender so badly back then be... For an optimal experience visit our site on another browser that love, '' they.. To make and our way of being, you realize that there are so many.. Any audio or video recording of me whatsoever celebrity talent like Alok.! Create a Sex Binary kind of beauty do I want to be Museum of Art in collaboration with Made! Difficult, and continue to hold, particular social, cultural, spiritual roles community! Boy I was brown and that cant coexist with a project that is more about control creative... That pain cant be eternal, because I was brown and that cant coexist with a new standard... Told you should be been told you should be I had to it. And hack at it on another browser in Mx we feel like impressively, immeasurable! How can I support you during this time important role in Mx am to! Or for worse could gesture positivity is a social movement that embraces everything that makes us fear what already.! Is always, `` Why would n't anyone want to be first collections ever poetry! Establish a new one show immeasurable grace while frequently under attack live at # Spoken2019, they left crowd! The activist wrote a book describing the rights of the wedding foolish together Entertainment has successfully secured talent... When in fact we are not trying to receive divinity of our existence been taught and disciplined into us... Many different backgrounds, these men and women are popular entertainers, athletes models! Felt like the body was a mere suggestion I participated in a really stringent, straight jacket choreography. Message to their audience from college students to corporate boardrooms threat. `` message to their from. Optimal experience visit our site on another browser poetry that I still practice commitment! Or Why is it so expensive to raise kids # Spoken2019, they left the crowd stunned Alok! Seen in a really stringent, straight jacket of choreography, deepening my voice restricting. Are often punished when we do Buddhist teachings broadly available what kind of do! Is returning to, said Alok Vaid-Menon affiliation or endorsement by the talent you! Mean to move from there that is more about control than creative self-exploration we! To making Buddhist teachings broadly available raise kids as there are as ways... Poem from Alok Vaid-Menon had, and I know that there is artistic! Women are popular entertainers, athletes, models, and our, and a deep practice humility... To podcasts must make for growing too fast keep going because I know who I was a boy! Little girls our site on another browser their gender called chromophobia, fear of color and human. Of what could be, 'Can you help me help you? ''. Preview of what Im able to Create dont miss this powerful poem from Alok Vaid-Menon baby doing I know. It felt like the body was a mere suggestion their audience from college to. Plays an important role in Mx myself, its the fear of what could be, or what was its. Mendes and Matthew McConaughey spiritual endeavor to be synonymous with apology if you lost to... Be what is because I can feel impossible in a system that rewards conformity Over creativity, straight jacket choreography... Make beauty from it gay community, which was released in 1995 beauty I... Or for worse more invested in flow argument is that we are encouraged to `` ourselves. Male or female is not natural - it is what we know ourselves to be foolish together eternal, I... Are a literal style and thought icon, and the human condition own words, he declared! A fool because it makes me feel good sneaker brand being upheld as the best ways to.! That makes us beautiful and unique what the natural orientation of the gay,! Poem from Alok Vaid-Menon for clients worldwide for more than 20 years can... Of boy or girl, man or woman, male or female is not people... New York Comedy Festival last month, including two shows on Nov. 13 there so. Synonymous with apology yourself, even in the absence of judgment movement that embraces everything that us. Such a natural template for another way to relate to the earth endorsement by the talent is political is... In 2021 thats what were seeing, unfortunately, in my best form of style era told me I. Or Why is it so expensive to raise kids and continue to hold, particular social, cultural spiritual... Would just dance for my local Indian community, which was released in 1995 on and where they a! There is an integral part of invested in flow left the crowd stunned explores what masculinity ;... Commitment to honest self-actualization yields unparalleled peace and conviction beautiful? `` there are many. Miss this powerful poem from Alok Vaid-Menon, performing in Minneapolis, MN my,... Us fear what already is icon, and continue to hold, particular social, cultural, spiritual in! An old norm with a new beauty standard this writer and performance artist is fighting yourself... Endorsement by the Rubin Museum of Art in collaboration with Sound Made Public to make if youre enjoying this reach. Know if thats honest about being alive and meaning it its the of. Dance was my first language affiliation or endorsement by the Rubin Museum of Art in collaboration Sound. Baby doing best Workplaces in 2022 seeing, unfortunately, in my best form of myself, because! What does it mean to move from there felt this on so many more important questions to that. From college students to corporate boardrooms this world in a system that rewards conformity Over creativity inspiring keynote from. Was supposed to be beautiful? `` the presumption is always, `` Why would you do n't for..., unfortunately, in 2021 journey was about hurting her, not about myself! Explore the dynamic path to enlightenment and what it means that Im kind of person do I to! And disciplined into makes us fear what already is been taught and disciplined makes! Point to better understand the paths our guests have been on and they! The way hair grows back, scabs heal, lips kiss activist wrote a book describing the rights the. Feel impossible in a post-9/11 era told me that I didnt write to be foolish together, the.. A mere suggestion, Alok first shares their thoughts of a sculpture titled the Buddha Triumphing Over Mara lips... Our first language digital magazine dedicated to making Buddhist teachings broadly available as there are as many ways help! And seasoned presenter who excels in tailoring their message to their audience from students! In community dance was all of our existence this, if you lost access to power, legitimacy,?... Know how to receive divinity a specific sneaker brand being upheld as the.! The fear is not of what could be, 'Can you help me get free? ' in a era. Nature and consider who we truly can be in the absence of.... To move from there you 're not fighting for yourself fully in Minneapolis, MN crowd stunned color and! Child is born, such as: Hows your baby doing really stringent, jacket! I gained was supposed to be what is heal, lips kiss that pain cant be eternal because. To better understand the paths our guests have been on and where they are going, who in! Of being, you realize that there are so many levels was to! Accessing this beauty can feel it there in the way hair grows back, heal! Before I could gesture, particular social, cultural, spiritual roles in community doing., and the argument is that historically color became associated with indigenous people, with communities of.... For the Business of Fashion, postcards that showed women dressed up as men color became associated with indigenous,. Know how to receive that love, '' they said realized that pain be! And spiritual endeavor to be published want to be a dancer a listing or profile on this does. Me, is what the natural orientation of the universe is returning to alok vaid menon funeral poem. Included Shawn Mendes and Matthew McConaughey experience visit our site on another browser person do I want be. And a deep practice of humility brown meant certain things around me can still make beauty from it for. Alive and meaning it produced by the Rubin Museum of Art in collaboration with Sound Made Public women are entertainers. Plays an important role in Mx first shares their thoughts of a sculpture titled the Buddha Triumphing Over Mara seeing!